Archive for the 'Food' Category

Staycation, Day 1: Homemade Salsa

Sunday, August 30th, 2009 | 6 Comments »
FLAME BROILED tomatoes and onions

FLAME BROILED tomatoes and onions

There’s a tomato blight occurring throughout the northeast which has made a noticeable dent in the variety and abundance of tomatoes available at the farmers’ market and in our CSA share. In spite of the blight, there are still a lot of tomatoes to be had, what with it being hard to keep a good tomato down in late August. So we picked up a bunch of your garden variety red tomatoes (plus some fancy heirlooms too good for salsa) at the market on Saturday and made Mattbot’s Famous Salsa, a tried and true recipe that involves Googling “best salsa recipe” for 15 minutes before arbitrarily picking one.

This particular recipe employed Burger King’s patented flame broiling method. I stuck all the veggies above plus a jalepeno and anaheim pepper, plus two huge cloves of garlic—under the broiler for about 10 minutes. When they had cooled a bit, I squeezed some of the water from the tomatoes and tossed all of the roasted veggies into the food processor with a big handful of chopped cilantro and a 3:1 ratio of cumin to salt (to taste, natch). I hit pulse a few times and… picante! I paired the chips and salsa with a Lagunitas IPA, which lately has been my go-to beer.

World’s greatest sandwich invented minutes ago

Monday, January 19th, 2009 | 5 Comments »

Chicken salad sliders
Chicken Salad Sliders.

This sandwich puts extra chicken to work for you. The English muffin succeeds where more notable breads fail. A sourdough places too much of a masticatory burden on the eater, ejecting chicken salad out the back of the sandwich. A toasted English muffin offers a perfect combination of sandwich structure and ease of chewing.

For the Chicken Salad

1 roasted chicken. I highly recommend Alice Waters’s method, described in The Art of Simple Food. And don’t skimp on the chicken, get one of those pampered free range birds that only urban liberal elites eat, it’s worth it.
Some mayonnaise
A mustard you like
Any combination of: diced apples, diced pears, chopped celery, olives, diced pickles, chopped banana peppers, chopped walnuts — really, whatever you like in your chicken salad. I went with celery and apples; in the future I’ll substitute something saltier for apples, as the finished product was a tad too close to Waldorf salad for my taste.
Salt and pepper to taste

Chicken Salad Preparation

Roast the chicken and eat it for dinner. Don’t worry, there will be plenty left over. Pick off any remaining chicken from the carcass and tear into bite-size chunks (this is easy, but somewhat messy). Add mayo, mustard, and any additional ingredients you’d like in your chicken salad. Exact measurements aren’t really necessary—just add ingredients until it looks and tastes right to you.

For the Slider

1 English muffin, toasted
Mustard to taste

Slider Preparation

Toast the English muffin. Pile the chicken salad high atop the sturdier half of the muffin, add mustard to the other half. Combine and serve for $4 each at the letterpress-studio-slash-brewpub you plan to open “in your 30s.”

Related coverage

Greatest sandwich ever invented minutes ago (December 7, 2005)
World’s greatest sandwich invented tonight (February 5, 2005)
“Best sandwich ever” invented late last night (December 17, 2004)

What I did on my winter vacation

Sunday, January 4th, 2009 | 4 Comments »

Christmas dinner
Ate crab. Maggie and I decided to go big and stay at home for Christmas dinner. The menu: snow crab legs, artichokes, and sweet potato fries. A duet of Hitachino Nest ales complemented our meal.


Brewed beer. This one is an imperial wheat stout. I made a yeast starter for the first time, which created such a vigorous fermentation that it blew the stopper off the top of the carboy on the first night. The blowoff tube I rigged up to handle the excess CO2 provided quality entertainment for two days straight… if you’re a fan of fart jokes, that is.

Buddy
Raced Buddy. I had a lovely New Years in frigid New Hampshire with Maggie’s family. In spite of the temperature, I wanted to spend a little time in the wide open spaces of rural New England so I went out with Buddy out a couple of times. We raced him up the driveway in near-zero temperatures—while it’s humbling to be beaten by a dog, it’s perhaps even more humbling to have to catch one’s breath for a solid ten minutes after the defeat.

Tubby Boots Goes Topless

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2008 | 4 Comments »

Tubby Boots Goes Topless

…while Tony enjoys a New York slice

Today’s lunch: PBJ and Cool Ranch Doritos

Thursday, June 21st, 2007 | 3 Comments »

Nothing brings back the memories of the Kenwood Elementary cafeteria like today’s lunch. I keep looking over my shoulder, waiting for my mom embarrass me by stopping by and asking how my day is going in front of all my friends.

Also: ask me about my plan to completely eliminate litter in NYC by establishing an above-equilibrium price floor on 25 cent bags of chips!