as we may blog

Eyesore Herky statues in disrespeck shockah:

Vandals ripped another of the Herky on Parade statues from its pedestal, making it the third weekend in a row the a status was damaged.

Vandals have ripped three other statues from their pedestals in recent weeks. Vandals ripped the “Shine-On Herky” from its pedestal and dumped it in a ditch at Highway 6 and First Avenue in Coralville last weekend.

The base and a foot were all that remained of “Dancer Herky” after it was damaged by vandals on Oct. 9 on the corner of Madison and Jefferson streets in Iowa City. The statue was sponsored by the University of Iowa Dance Marathon. The “Reflections of U” Herky, a block away on Jefferson Street, also was destroyed on Oct. 9. That statue, covered with mirror mosaic tiles and sponsored by the University of Iowa Alumni Association, was torn off its base and thrown into the street.

Several of the public art statues have been damaged since the program’s launch in May, however the last three weeks damage has become more severe.

Meanwhile, pants and wang in hand, the U-M serial flasher strikes again:

After a more than two-week hiatus, a man who has been exposing himself to women near the University of Michigan Central Campus has struck again.

A group of women sitting on a porch in the 1100 block of South Forest Avenue said a man ran between two houses at 1:30 a.m. today, reports said. They said he was carrying his pants in his hand and fondling himself, police said.

A 20-year-old woman told police she yelled at the man, and she and her housemates went inside to call police. The women said they only saw the man for a minute and did not see where he went after they walked into the home, reports said.

Another crime statistic yet to hit the presses: this author witnessed the theft of three slices of pepperoni pizza Friday night from two patrons of New York Pizza Depot (note: there is no pizza train) too full to finish their pie. The vandals are described as clumsy and extremely white.

2nd grader K. C. Rg writes:

Some government officials say rural areas in Iowa are getting an unfair share of federal anti-terrorism dollars.

The Des Moines Register reports that of the first $28 million coming to the state $250,000 will go to Des Moines.

Meanwhile, counties with fewer people will get more money, mostly used to buy things like traffic cones and paper shredders.

Law enforcement officials in Des Moines say they can’t even afford new helmets for officers.

I don’t see what the big deal is here. Paper shredders are an invaluable tool in this administration’s war on terrorism. To wit, what are officials supposed to use once their black redacting pen runs out of ink?

And for the love of God, could "law enforcement officials" put two and two together? The sudden surplus of traffic cones should be welcome news for those in search of new helmets.

Participants:
| mattbot (mattbot_5000@hotmail.com)
| Joey Bagadonutz (superrcat@msn.com)

[09:34:37 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: i am not going to dress professional today.
[09:35:03 AM] mattbot: assless chaps?
[09:35:07 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: i am going to wear flip flops, hoodie, ripped jeans and a trucker cap
[09:35:23 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: no.
[09:35:28 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: :|
[09:35:31 AM] mattbot: careful, the hipster police might pull you over
[09:35:52 AM] mattbot: you have a license for that trucker cap?
[09:35:55 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: you are making fun of my style.
[09:36:05 AM] mattbot: is that REAL faux retro sir?
[09:36:13 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: no.
[09:36:14 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: AE
[09:36:41 AM] mattbot: well moving on
[09:36:49 AM] mattbot: do you expect to be punished for your non-professional attire?
[09:36:59 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: fuck it
[09:37:11 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: i gotta be me.
[09:37:20 AM] mattbot: via AE
[09:37:27 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: and A&F
[09:38:24 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: underwear or no?
[09:38:50 AM] mattbot: i am concerned that there is even a question
[09:38:56 AM] mattbot: and even more concerned that you want my advice
[09:40:05 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: looks like i don’t have any clean…it will be a freeball day
[09:40:34 AM] mattbot: that is the first and last reference to your “ball”
[09:40:50 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: balls?
[09:40:56 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: i have 3.
[09:42:19 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: what’s your damage?
[09:44:06 AM] mattbot: what?
[09:44:26 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: ’s your damage?
[09:44:37 AM] Joey Bagadonutz: bbl, i need to drive to work.
[09:44:38 AM] * Joey Bagadonutz is now Offline

By Christine Doty
The Gazette
Friday, June 20, 2003, 5:52:44 PM

HIAWATHA — My daughters and I took my husband out to The Pizza Ranch for Father’s Day — which proved to be a good family choice.

The restaurant opened Jan. 13 in the InTenTcity building, 1195 Boyson Rd., Hiawatha.

The tent-shaped building has a Hollywood Tan, Golden Palace (Chinese food), Guaranty Bank, Texaco and a Gas Shack in addition to The Pizza Ranch.

The restaurant has numerous locations in Iowa, Minnesota, Nebraska, North Dakota, South Dakota and one in Michigan.

The Hiawatha location is big, clean and roomy. It has many booths and lots of tables. It has a separate entrance or you can go through the Gas Shack, a convenience store. You can even access the building’s lobby, where there is a large display of antique coin banks.

I thought it was perfect for a family with children who aren’t overly fond of sitting. They could walk around and look at the banks, and the parents could still keep an eye on them through the windows. My 11-year-old daughter loved the two arcade games in the Gas Shack, and we could watch her from our booth.

The food is pretty basic but good.

The restaurant offers a large array of pizzas, including an all vegetable “Prairie”; a “Stampede,” covered with almost everything except anchovies; a “BLT,” which is just like the sandwich, including mayonnaise; a “Chicken Broccoli Alfredo”; or you can choose whatever ingredients you want.

It’s not all about pizza, however. The menu also has Crispy Ranch Chicken dinners with mashed potatoes or potato wedges and cole slaw. Or you can get the chicken in barbecue sauce. Sandwich options include three wraps: a Bacon and Chicken Wrap, a Caesar Wrap and a BBQ Wrap.

For families who have a hard time making decisions or those times when everyone wants something different, Pizza Ranch offers four value meals. We chose the Ranch Pack 4, which includes any medium pizza, eight pieces of chicken, potatoes, Ranch Stix with cheese and Cactus Bread.

We selected the Roundup pizza, with beef, pepperoni, Italian sausage, onions, mush- rooms and black olives.

The Ranch Stix came out first — eight pieces of flat breadsticks covered with melted mozzarella cheese served with marinara sauce.

Next came our chicken, mashed potatoes, gravy and one roll. The chicken was really good and crispy. Even the white meat was juicy. And the mashed potatoes were a hit.

We were starting to get full when they brought out the pizza.

It says on the menu that the thin crust was “sure to put a smile on your face.” It was really good, and we probably would have smiled more had we not been so full.

We thought we were done and didn’t think we had room for one more bite, but then came the “Cactus Bread.” It was basically a small pizza crust, cut into eight pieces, with streusel crumbs, cinnamon sugar and white icing drizzled on top. It was excellent.

We thought it was odd that we had only gotten one dinner roll but after we were done eating, we saw that one roll still sitting on the platter, and no one wanted to eat it as we were too full.

All that food came to a grand total of $31.05, which included two beers. And we had enough leftovers for lunch the next day for two of us.

I’m sure we’ll be visiting again soon.

This is a gem: "Red Lobster delivers quick, satisfying experience". I had to mirror the page on my site because The Gazette’s site is subscription-only. That’s right, you have to pay for the privilege of reading writing this good. The Best Part™: "He enjoyed his meal, and helped me eat some of mine."

Thanks to Mags for the link!